By Katina Rice-Davis
Behind a smile, a helping hand and the image of a woman who always seemed strong enough to carry the weight of others, Tiffany L. McCree was fighting a battle of her own.
For years, McCree carried the emotional and physical pain of domestic violence while striving to raise her three children and hold her family together. Now, the Woodruff native is using her voice to encourage others who may be suffering in silence through her newly released book, For All The Wrong Reasons: A True Story of Love, Abuse, Survival and God’s Unfailing Grace.
Released in recognition of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, McCree’s book is more than a personal account of painful experiences. It is a testimony of survival, faith and the possibility of finding peace after trauma.
Originally from Woodruff, McCree is the daughter of the late Carolyn Miller Bivens, granddaughter of the late Mary Ann Miller and great-granddaughter of the late Lorean Casey. She grew up on Snowmill before her family moved to Cincinnati, Ohio, where they lived for approximately 10 years. The family eventually returned to Woodruff and settled in Kelly Acres, a neighborhood she credits with helping shape the woman she is today.
Those early experiences taught her to appreciate life, embrace her morals and value family. She also credits her mother’s determination to create better opportunities for her four daughters with helping lay the foundation for the woman she would become. However, the experiences McCree witnessed and endured during childhood would later influence what she accepted in adulthood.
“Growing up, I witnessed and endured things I knew were wrong, but I was often told to stay in a child’s place,” McCree explained. “I believe some of that trauma followed me into adulthood and caused me to settle for situations I never should have accepted.”
At age 20, McCree married, eventually finding herself experiencing the very circumstances she once believed she would never tolerate: domestic violence.
“The signs were there, but at the time, I didn’t fully understand what I was experiencing,” she said.
Her story reflects a reality that domestic violence advocates continue to emphasize: abuse does not always begin with physical violence, nor is it always apparent to the people closest to the person experiencing it.
McCree said she had long been known as the dependable friend, the listening ear and the person others could turn to in difficult times. Because people were accustomed to seeing her as the strong one, many did not realize she was struggling behind closed doors.
“I was the rock everyone leaned on, but I was hiding under a rock myself,” she said.
She wants others to understand that domestic violence can involve emotional, mental, verbal and physical abuse. The effects can reach far beyond visible injuries, damaging a person’s confidence, peace of mind and sense of self-worth. Manipulation can cause someone to question their value, while controlling behaviors can gradually separate them from family, friends and the support systems they need.
Among the warning signs McCree encourages people to recognize are isolation from loved ones, excessive jealousy disguised as love, attempts to control clothing or phone use, constant put-downs, threats and behaviors that make a person question their own judgment.
“Love should never require you to lose yourself, your freedom, or the people who genuinely care about you,” she said.
For McCree, one of the greatest challenges was surviving physically and emotionally while continuing to mother her three children and maintain a sense of stability for her family. Her children became a powerful source of motivation, alongside her faith in God and the determination she found within herself, even when her strength felt depleted.
“Being strong doesn’t mean you never feel afraid or broken,” she said. “Sometimes, strength simply means finding the courage to take one more step when you don’t know what tomorrow will bring.”
A Story Waiting More Than a Decade to Be Told
The journey to publishing For All The Wrong Reasons was not an easy one. For more than 10 years, McCree struggled with putting her experiences into words. She would pick up her pen, begin writing, then put it down again as memories resurfaced and emotions became difficult to process.
Sharing her story meant revisiting some of the most painful moments of her life. Yet, through prayer and faith, she continued to feel that her testimony had a purpose beyond her own healing.
“What inspired me to share my story was realizing that my pain could have a purpose beyond me,” she said.
McCree acknowledged that she has chosen to share certain portions of her life while keeping other experiences private. She believes survivors should have the freedom to tell their stories at their own pace and determine what they are comfortable making public.
Her decision to continue writing came from the belief that another woman might be experiencing similar circumstances and need to hear that she was not alone.
“If sharing my testimony helps even one person recognize her worth, I know there is purpose in telling my story,” she said.
Her faith remained central throughout the process, although she admits there were times when it was tested. There were moments when the pain was so overwhelming that she questioned why she was experiencing such hardship despite the faith she held dear. Still, she continued to hold on, even when she could not understand what she was going through.
Today, McCree views her survival as an opportunity to encourage others and remind them that difficult seasons do not have to determine the outcome of their lives.
“His grace reminded me that I was never alone and that my pain was not the end of my story,” she said of her faith in God.
McCree is now in her second and last marriage, describing her current husband as a supportive partner who has helped nurture her and her three children back to a place of peace. She credits him with praying alongside her, supporting her growth and helping her rediscover parts of herself she believed she had lost.
Her life today represents a significant contrast to the pain she once endured. Rather than simply surviving, she is learning to embrace her identity, protect her peace and grow into the woman she believes God created her to be.
“Healing has meant choosing ME!” McCree said. “I wake up every day with a purpose: to change, grow, and become a better version of myself.”
She added that choosing herself is not selfish but necessary.
Changing the Conversation About Domestic Violence
As communities recognize Domestic Violence Awareness Month in October, McCree hopes her story will encourage more honest conversations about abuse and help people better understand the experiences of survivors. She believes one of the most damaging misconceptions is that domestic violence could never happen to someone who appears confident, independent or strong.
Abuse can affect people from all walks of life, including those who continue to work, raise children, support friends and participate in their communities while silently struggling at home.
McCree also wants people to reconsider how they respond when someone reveals that they have experienced abuse. Rather than asking survivors why they stayed or why they did not leave sooner, she encourages family members and friends to offer understanding, patience and support.
“Staying doesn’t mean someone wants to be abused,” she explained. “Sometimes, it takes time, support, and strength to find a way out.”
Fear, financial difficulties, concerns about children and the possibility of further harm can make leaving an abusive relationship complicated. Survivors may also experience isolation and a loss of confidence that make it difficult to recognize their options.
McCree believes families, churches and community organizations have an important role to play in creating safe environments where people can speak without fear of judgment.
“We must be willing to have the hard conversations, listen without blaming, and offer support without pressure,” she said. “One conversation, one safe place, or one person willing to listen could save someone’s life.”
She encourages people to check on friends who are often viewed as the strongest in their circles, reminding them that those who consistently support others may also need someone to support them.
For anyone concerned about a loved one, McCree recommends approaching the person with compassion rather than criticism, allowing them to speak when they are ready and reminding them that they do not have to face their circumstances alone.
A Message of Hope and a Vision for the Future
McCree’s commitment to helping others extends beyond the pages of her book. Along with For All The Wrong Reasons, she has released 30-Day Journal: Loving Me Again, a resource intended to complement her message of self-worth, personal growth and healing.
She hopes both works will reach women who feel isolated, daughters who need guidance, and family members and friends seeking a better understanding of domestic violence.
Her long-term vision includes opening a safe home for women and children who have experienced domestic violence. She hopes to create a place where survivors can find safety, rebuild their confidence, begin healing and prepare for a new chapter in their lives.
She is also planning a book signing, with hopes of bringing the event to her hometown of Woodruff, and has speaking engagements planned. McCree welcomes opportunities to share her testimony and raise awareness about domestic violence. For her, the goal is not simply to tell her story but to help others discover that a different future is possible.
When asked what she would say to someone who may be enduring abuse in silence, McCree offered a direct message of encouragement: “CHOOSE YOU! You are loved, you are worthy, and you deserve a love that doesn’t hurt you.”
She urges survivors not to blame themselves for their circumstances or allow another person’s treatment of them to determine their worth. She also encourages those who are experiencing abuse to reach out to someone they trust and seek help when it is safe to do so.
McCree understands that healing takes time, and she does not suggest that rebuilding a life after abuse happens overnight. Instead, she emphasizes the importance of taking one step at a time and extending grace to oneself throughout the process.
“Your past does not define you, your pain does not have to be the end of your story, and God’s grace can carry you through even your darkest moments,” she said. “There is life beyond the pain, and your story isn’t over yet!”
Through For All The Wrong Reasons, McCree hopes readers will come to understand that love should never require someone to sacrifice their identity, safety or peace. Her journey from silently enduring abuse to openly sharing her testimony demonstrates her desire to turn painful experiences into an opportunity to encourage others.
She hopes her words will help survivors recognize their worth, begin the healing process and find the courage to take steps toward a safer future. For McCree, the message is simple: survival is not the end of the journey. Healing, growth and renewed purpose are possible.
For All The Wrong Reasons: A True Story of Love, Abuse, Survival and God’s Unfailing Grace and 30-Day Journal: Loving Me Again are available on Amazon. Copies may also be purchased directly from McCree, who offers shipping to readers. For speaking engagements, interviews and booking inquiries, contact Tiffany L. McCree at Tiffanymccree@yahoo.com.
As Domestic Violence Awareness Month continues, McCree’s testimony serves as a reminder that behind closed doors, someone may be fighting a battle others cannot see—and that compassion, support and access to safe resources can make a difference.
